Politics
Boris Johnson becoming a dad at home would be good news indeed
Between the floods, Brexit and the growing number of coronavirus cases, the UK remains under a dark cloud.
Presumably, Johnson and his new fiancee Carrie Symonds thought he might be happy to learn about their impending parenthood – together, that is, given that Johnson already has countless numbers of descendants – and the wedding to come.
These weddings, dependent on Johnson’s current wife who signs the absolute decree, were only announced coincidentally on the same day as the official resignation of official Sir Philip Rutnam.
While it was not the return to work at Downing Street that we hoped for, baby news has managed to skew the news agenda.
Speculation at the place of conception of the mounted baby, so to speak. If the Johnson-Symonds follow the Beckham naming traditions, that child could be called Balmoral or Party-Conference.
Madame Tussauds was quick to add a baby sling to Boris Johnson wax.
Guys, can't we treat this like a pretty little lark, please? Our government is struggling with a moronavirus. Questioned yesterday, the House of Commons leader suggested that people might like to sing the national anthem while washing their hands to prevent the spread of the virus.
Presumably, Jacob Rees-Mogg intends to suggest that the anthem will provide adequate hand washing time and not that God Save the Queen will kill germs with his patriotic power but, frankly, God does not know than with this crowd.
Just be careful to sing too loudly in the public restroom, the least people get up from their seats, creating a whole new public health emergency.
Back to Boris, and the deadline for his most recent sprog would be June, coinciding with the G7 summit at Camp David, Maryland. It also comes up against the meeting of Commonwealth heads of government in Rwanda and a high-level Brexit summit before a meeting of the European Council in Brussels.
As Jeremy Corbyn has already mentioned, he is a part-time Prime Minister. "Where's Boris?" conducted the refrain as the flood victims wondered why the head of the country had not come to visit them. Unsurprisingly, he wouldn't have cut his vacation short. You might think that Johnson is the ideal man in charge during a viral epidemic, given his skill in washing hands, but do we really trust that he can rule the country when of a health emergency?
Johnson would be the first Prime Minister in office since the Duke of Grafton's divorce in 1769. He would be the first Prime Minister to marry power for 250 years.
These are not impressive milestones. It is a married man who permeated his mistress. He is about to have a child, while apparently showing little interest in those he already has, with a woman four years older than his eldest daughter.
What the hell should we expect from Bozzie Bear and Little Otter's wedding? His first, at Allegra Mostyn-Owen, was described as a "cross between La Dolce Vita and Brideshead Revisited", an event that Johnson forgot to wear pants or shoes. Her second marriage took place only a few days after the legal end of her first.
All his marriages overlap and the two previous ones were marked by business. Few politicians can get away with such behavior – Donald Trump is another – and why?
This is because it is the only point on which he is honest. He is an immoral and hypocritical cadet and never claimed to be anything else.
How exasperating it is for decent and strong women politicians to fight to balance politics and children – think of MSP Gail Ross leaving his constituency of Caithness, Sutherland and Ross before his full talents were seen – while these mediocre men potter in the office without having to give the question a second thought.
Ms. Symonds looks like a relatively modern young woman. Maybe she will insist that he take his share of shared parental leave.
The "happy" part of this happy announcement would be that Johnson shares his job, preferably with someone who is genuinely competent and committed to getting the job done.
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