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Girlfriend Worried About Lack Of Invitations To Her Boyfriend’s House

 


DEAR ABBY: I’m 43 years old and my boyfriend is 40 years old. He is always at my house, but I can never go to his place to sit and relax. When I blame myself and want to talk to him about it, he tells me that it is not at all the case. I am welcome at any time. But when I suggest it, I am always refused. I try a lot to be optimistic, but I have so many negative thoughts about it. What should I do?

– Kept away

DEAR READER: It seems that your boyfriend is more comfortable at home than welcoming you home. Why no one would. Maybe he’s lazy and doesn’t want to sit up for a guest. Maybe he doesn’t want to provide the food or drink you prefer. Are you sure he lives alone and that there is no other hen sitting in his nest?

You haven’t said how long you’ve been together as a couple, but it looks like he’s been enjoying it. He also seems to be quite adept at denying the reality of hospitality. Unless he can explain to you why you can’t come, your negative thoughts about it may be justified.

DEAR ABBY: I am a man in his twenties who has a very small appetite. I regularly eat small portions throughout the day. During the holidays and other occasions, I eat a lot with the parents of my friends, or with my grandparents or other family members. They think I should have the typical “growing boy” appetite and eat large amounts of food with each meal. When I don’t clean my plate (or even half), they ask me what’s wrong or if I don’t like it. Usually I enjoyed it a lot, but I just couldn’t finish it all. How to navigate these dinners without offending anyone’s cooking?

– Quickly satisfied

DEAR READER: If possible, what you should do is serve yourself the portions you are comfortable eating rather than wasting food. If this is not possible, calmly point out to your hosts that although you like what they prepare, you are used to eating small portions throughout the day and would appreciate it if they did not not overwhelm you. It is a reasonable request and should not offend anyone.

DEAR ABBY: I’ve been married to the same woman for 24 years. We have been faithful since we took our vows and have never had a reason to go astray. I have watched her over the years and have told myself how lucky I am to have an incredibly beautiful woman by my side. She is everything I have ever wanted and more – intelligent, empathetic and a fun, outgoing person with whom I am in love. She is more and more beautiful.

My question is, after all these years, is it unnatural that I just want to be near her, smell her, hold her? I really can’t keep my hands away from her.

– Handsy

DEAR READER: As long as your wife doesn’t feel overwhelmed, your need to touch her is not only natural, it’s enviable. Many women would not only love to be worshiped the way you do it, but they would return the favor.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby on DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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