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Lessons from a Hollywood Career Coach

Lessons from a Hollywood Career Coach


“Lost in a dark part”

Dear Rémy,

I spent much of 2023 filming a reboot of a classic film. It has skyrocketed my profile and been creatively liberating, but I also worry that I have “lost” myself in the role. I played an unwavering bully and I think that unlocked something in me. Something dark.

Since we finished, I've been planning to break the spirit of anyone unfortunate enough to cross my path.

My driver won't talk to me, all because I compared his driving style to the “It's a Small World” ride. My personal chef hasn't returned to work since I noticed I could find better sliders in the Wendy's dumpster.

And my caregiver started giving me the silent treatment the day I told her her new jacket made her look like a Walmart Christmas tree.

The truth is: I think I enjoyed all those conversations.

As a young actor in Hollywood, I was asked to bend and mold to the whims of the industry. I worry that I’m the one who “chills out.” Is there a healthier way to channel this incursive impulse?

Dear steadfast tyrant,

As you have the self-awareness to suggest, these outbursts may well be a sign of backsliding after years of suppressing your anger at the industry.

We often think of anger as a “bad” emotion, but anger is a useful, necessary and powerful energy.

It must not be blocked or pushed aside. Likewise, it is neither appropriate nor fair for you to vent to paid subordinates, like your PA or driver.

There are plenty of other outlets for your rage that won't lead to an employment lawsuit and/or your annulment. Why not express your fury at the Tinseltown machine by kickboxing, hitting your mattress with a baseball bat, or shouting obscenities in front of the Hollywood sign at 3 a.m.?

Remy Blumenfeld is a veteran television producer and founder of Vitality.Guru, which provides business and career coaching to top performers in media. Send your questions to: [email protected]

Questions edited by Sarah Mills




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