The bride refuses to force the groom’s androgynous niece to wear a dress at her wedding and supports her

Editor’s note: This article was originally published on May 6, 2022. It has since been updated.

Often when it comes to weddings, people lose sight of it being a celebration of love and get caught up in the drama of it all. Family ties, lifelong friendships, and even the relationship between the bride and groom can come under a lot of strain and sometimes crack during the wedding planning process. A bride-to-be found herself in just such a situation when she was caught up in a family drama with her fiancé’s niece and the niece’s parents over what the teenager should wear until the big day. Reddit user Extreme-Break-6638 took to the r/AmItheAsshole community with his riddle, asking, “AITA for telling my future niece she doesn’t need to wear a dress to my wedding?”

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The 32-year-old began by explaining that shortly after her engagement, she thought it would be a good idea to ask her fiancé’s niece if she would like to be a bridesmaid at their wedding next year. “I’ve only met her a few times so we’re not close, but she seemed like a cool kid and I thought it might be a good way for us to bond, d ‘get to know each other and get her involved in the wedding. Note: she is the only niece/nephew on either side of the family,’ wrote Extreme-Break-6638.

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Little did the bride know, her sweet gesture would end up putting the 15-year-old in a rather awkward position when it comes to bridesmaid outfits. “A few weeks ago we were in my fiancé’s hometown to visit his family and discuss wedding-related things. His brother, sister-in-law and their daughter came over and I noticed this time that ‘she was dressed a lot more androgynous than I remembered. The topic shifted to wedding dresses and bridesmaid dresses and I could see she was immediately uncomfortable Her parents (mum really) and grandma were commenting on how she would need to be more feminine/brush her hair etc and how nice it would be to see her like that,” shared Reddit user.

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“I’m going to be honest and say it got to me because I was really a tomboy as a teenager (even though I’m not anymore) and it absolutely broke me every time my loved ones said things. Eventually her mom made a comment like, ‘It’s going to be nice to see you dressed like a girl for once’ and she looked really sad/embarrassed/upset,” she revealed . Triggered by the words of her soon-to-be sister-in-law, the bride stood up for the teenager and assured her she could wear whatever she was comfortable in.

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“In response, because it really touched a nerve, I immediately told her that my bridesmaid would be wearing a pantsuit for the wedding and not a dress and that I had given all the bridesmaids the able to wear whatever they wanted as long as it’s in the “wedding color” to make it easier. I pulled out my phone and started showing her pictures of the ideas my friend gave me. had sent (a tailored jumpsuit, culottes, pantsuit, tuxedo, etc.) and I let her know she can choose whatever she wants – she can even wear jeans and sneakers if it makes her feel comfortable and it’s a wedding, not a fashion show,” Extreme-Break-6638 revealed.

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Although it was a huge relief for the teenager, the bride’s efforts to comfort the youngster did not sit well with the girl’s mother. “She’s since asked my fiancé to pressure me into buying all the bridesmaids’ dresses so their daughter wears one (which, lol, no). My husband doesn’t care about what she’s wearing but obviously also I don’t want me and her family to argue on the wedding day I don’t want to back down because I know what it’s like to have to wear something that hurts you comfortable, but on the other hand, I know it’s only for one day and it would make the family happy,” she concluded, asking her fellow Redditors if she was wrong for canceling. the decision of the teenager’s mother.

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Members of the r/AmItheAsshole community were quick to assure the bride that this was a case in which she had every reason to turn into a “bridezilla” and set foot on the subject. bridesmaid outfits. “Definitely NTA. Don’t back down. Hold on. Never in my life did I think I would encourage someone to become a bridezilla. Please. Please. Be the bridezilla. Be a full bridezilla,” commented billlevansatmariposa.

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