Opinion | Biden and Trump's golf handicap spat at debate was a massive disaster

The dumbest debate in presidential history came to a head when President Biden and former President Donald Trump began bickering about, among other things, golf.

What did they say? Well, since I've written five books on golf, including Commander in Cheat: How Golf Explains Trump, let me translate.

It all started when CNN anchor Dana Bash mentioned their ages, which are barely older than igneous rock. If elected, either of them would become the oldest president in history. This has people worried. How much will it cost to convert the White House into an assisted living facility?

As they bragged about their exceptional fitness, the subject of golf handicaps came up. In golf, every avid player has a handicap, and the lower the number, the better. If you have a 10, that's pretty good and means your average score will be about 10 shots over par. If you have a 30, that's very bad and means you should probably take up pickleball.

Biden: I reduced my handicap to 6 when I was vice president.

Follow this author's opinionsRick Reilly

I slapped myself on the forehead. Biden had dragged himself to the podium as if he were wearing leg irons, so no one on Earth believed he was a 6-handicap. Trump yelled, “That’s the biggest lie, that he’s a 6-handicap, of all people!” Biden immediately changed his handicap to an 8, which only made things worse. It was like someone saying, “Okay, wait. Now I remember. I didn’t knock out Muhammad Ali. I knocked out Joe Frazier.”

And yet, if you go to the American Golf Association's online handicap website, Biden's listed handicap at Fieldstone Golf Club in Delaware is 6.7.

Pah. The site's stats are only as recent and accurate as the scores a player enters, and Biden hasn't entered a new score in six years. Looking at him now, one wonders if he could break 100. For nine.

Besides, why would you try to spit faster than a llama? Go ahead and brag about your gym sessions or bike rides; Trump has already cornered the market on outrageous golf lies. He regularly tells passersby that he has a 2.5 handicap, which is a complete load of bullshit. Okay, the USGA handicap website lists him as a 2.5 handicap, but did I mention that they rely on golfers to be honest? Trump is no more a 2.5 handicap than Mitch McConnell is a breakdancer.

I played golf with Trump. He's good off the tee, but he misses his shots, chips and misses his putts. He's actually a 10 or 12 handicap, and that's only because of the help of his caddies, who hit the balls out of the bunkers and out of the rubble.

So, to sum up, if Biden has a 6 handicap, elephants can hula hoop. And if Trump has a 2.5 handicap, they can do it on flagpoles.

Trump: I'm in very good health. I just won two club championships, not even senior, but two regular club championships.

Ok, this sentence contains so many lies that I need an abacus.

At almost every country club, there is an annual championship for members. Typically, the best golfers of all ages play for two days to see who is the best. All putts must be holed, all rules must be followed. Trump rarely does either. And yet he just won two club championships?

I've been in the golf business for half a century. I've never seen anyone over 55 win a club championship, let alone a 78-year-old with the silhouette of the Liberty Bell. The members I know at Trump's clubs tell me I still haven't done it.

Besides, I already know that Trump doesn’t actually win club championships, or even senior championships. He collects them, steals them, and invents them. He once told me, before he became a politician, that when he buys a new golf course (he owns about 16), he plays the first club championship by himself. Voila! He’s the champion. He also won a championship in New Jersey while he was in Philadelphia, he’s won others he never even played in, and he won another one at one of his Florida clubs, apparently while he was overseas with Kim Jong-un.

At least in the debate, after the nonsense about winning two club championships, Trump threw out a canard about golf that I'd never heard before.

Trump: To do that, you have to be very smart.

No, it's not. I've met some of the best golfers in the world, and some of them are so dense that light bends around them.

What Biden should have said at this point is, “Call us when you win a race on a course you don’t own, Donald.” Because Trump never did.

The whole debate went like this: Trump lied stupidly, leaving his chin wide open for a knockout blow, and Biden mumbled about Scranton.

Yeah, it was bad for Biden, but I don't care. I still prefer the old man to the crook. Debates are like golf. Sometimes it stinks up the club. I'm willing to give Biden a thumbs up. God knows Trump would take one.

Sources 1/ https://Google.com/ 2/ https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2024/07/02/biden-trump-golf-handicap-debate/ The mention sources can contact us to remove/changing this article

What Are The Main Benefits Of Comparing Car Insurance Quotes Online

LOS ANGELES, CA / ACCESSWIRE / June 24, 2020, / Compare-autoinsurance.Org has launched a new blog post that presents the main benefits of comparing multiple car insurance quotes. For more info and free online quotes, please visit https://compare-autoinsurance.Org/the-advantages-of-comparing-prices-with-car-insurance-quotes-online/ The modern society has numerous technological advantages. One important advantage is the speed at which information is sent and received. With the help of the internet, the shopping habits of many persons have drastically changed. The car insurance industry hasn't remained untouched by these changes. On the internet, drivers can compare insurance prices and find out which sellers have the best offers. View photos The advantages of comparing online car insurance quotes are the following: Online quotes can be obtained from anywhere and at any time. Unlike physical insurance agencies, websites don't have a specific schedule and they are available at any time. Drivers that have busy working schedules, can compare quotes from anywhere and at any time, even at midnight. Multiple choices. Almost all insurance providers, no matter if they are well-known brands or just local insurers, have an online presence. Online quotes will allow policyholders the chance to discover multiple insurance companies and check their prices. Drivers are no longer required to get quotes from just a few known insurance companies. Also, local and regional insurers can provide lower insurance rates for the same services. Accurate insurance estimates. Online quotes can only be accurate if the customers provide accurate and real info about their car models and driving history. Lying about past driving incidents can make the price estimates to be lower, but when dealing with an insurance company lying to them is useless. Usually, insurance companies will do research about a potential customer before granting him coverage. Online quotes can be sorted easily. Although drivers are recommended to not choose a policy just based on its price, drivers can easily sort quotes by insurance price. Using brokerage websites will allow drivers to get quotes from multiple insurers, thus making the comparison faster and easier. For additional info, money-saving tips, and free car insurance quotes, visit https://compare-autoinsurance.Org/ Compare-autoinsurance.Org is an online provider of life, home, health, and auto insurance quotes. This website is unique because it does not simply stick to one kind of insurance provider, but brings the clients the best deals from many different online insurance carriers. In this way, clients have access to offers from multiple carriers all in one place: this website. On this site, customers have access to quotes for insurance plans from various agencies, such as local or nationwide agencies, brand names insurance companies, etc. "Online quotes can easily help drivers obtain better car insurance deals. All they have to do is to complete an online form with accurate and real info, then compare prices", said Russell Rabichev, Marketing Director of Internet Marketing Company. CONTACT: Company Name: Internet Marketing CompanyPerson for contact Name: Gurgu CPhone Number: (818) 359-3898Email: [email protected]: https://compare-autoinsurance.Org/ SOURCE: Compare-autoinsurance.Org View source version on accesswire.Com:https://www.Accesswire.Com/595055/What-Are-The-Main-Benefits-Of-Comparing-Car-Insurance-Quotes-Online View photos