Conservatives live in an echo chamber with Kemi Badenoch as their spokesperson | John Crace

FFive years ago this week, Boris Johnson won an 80-seat majority in the general election. Life hasn't been this good for the Tories since the days of Margaret Thatcher. They couldn't believe their luck as they basked in the unbearable complacency of being. They would remain in government for at least another 10 years. The Labor Party? Who were they again? Remind me.

Fast forward to the present day and the Conservatives are a hollowed out rump with just 121 MPs. And the smartest conservatives are grateful to have so many. Few people think there is an easy way back to the party. The main lesson of the July election was not how much people loved Labor: but how much everyone hated the Tories. They had destroyed the country and everyone had had enough. Good riddance.

So you might have thought there would be people at the top of the Conservative Party who would want to understand what went wrong. Who wanted to make sense of such debauchery. Throwing away an inheritance with almost no consideration. Consumed in fighting against each other rather than doing anything that could benefit the country. Men and women determined to make the Conservative Party a credible political party.

Apparently not. Instead, the Conservatives have chosen to live in an echo chamber with Kemi Badenoch as their spokesperson. A woman driven by her own passions, neuroses and psychoses, who draws most of her intelligence from the deepest recesses of far-right conspiracy theories on the Internet. A leader who is out of touch with what most people in the country actually think or feel. Her fatal flaw is imagining that she knows better.

KemiKaze neither listens nor learns. She's just a reactive semi-autonomous being bouncing aimlessly around the dark web. A party leader who came to believe that the Conservatives' problem was that they were not conservative enough. David Cameron, Theresa May, Boris Johnson, Liz Truss and Rishi Sunak: all communist stooges.

What we expect from her is more of a pure right wing. It is not recognized that millions of people who had previously voted Conservative had instead supported Labor and the Liberal Democrats. If this was an intelligence test, then Kemi had failed spectacularly. D–.

Always. Never look for a gift horse and all that. And the Tories' spinning psychodrama is a gain for Labor. The Prime Minister's questions which could have been embarrassing for another opposition leader were on the contrary just a walk in the park. As has been the case for weeks now. And how will this play out in the foreseeable future. Because KemiKaze is incapable of changing. She is ready to self-destruct. Keir Starmers is lucky. Grateful for the small mercies.

Be careful, it could have been Nigel Farage or Lee Anderson who asked the questions in this LF. Because Kemi was determined to annex the reformed program. More concerned with preventing the last remnants of her supporters from drifting further to the right than trying to win back those she had lost to the center. Not even the center left.

KemiKaze's six questions were devoted to immigration. I use the word question loosely. Even in a figurative sense. They were long tirades of anger, personal violence, and anger with a theoretical question mark attached to the end. This was yet another family accommodation that was instantly forgettable. Useless. It was no use. If this is the sign of a properly functioning mature democracy, then Parliament is in big trouble.

From the start, KemiKaze was convulsed with rage. She really needs to spend less time on the Internet. Not everything she reads about X is necessarily true. I dread to think who she's following. Immigration was out of control, she shouted. Labor has done nothing to stop people from all over the world flooding into the country. His hatred for foreigners is growing more and more uncontrolled by the day. One day soon, she will short-circuit and stop mid-sentence.

Starmer tried to answer with reason. Could he just gently point out that it is the Conservatives who have presided over an open borders policy in recent years? Would it be helpful to point out that Badenoch had in fact been a member of the responsible government? So if she wanted to get angry, maybe she'd be better off yelling at herself in the mirror. Just a thought. After all, it wasn't very productive for her to blame the Labor Party for not sorting out all the bullshit her mob had concocted over the past 14 years.

This only made Kemi angrier. There is something about a collision with reality that only drives it to greater madness. This wouldn't be so bad if it was fun to watch. But that's not the case. Just the feeling that everyone is a little dirtier and a little more diminished as a result.

Now, KemiKaze has just brought forward his own poison. Starmer had personally written letters allowing rapists and murderers to reoffend. It was madness. As if Keir had personally begged the murderers to kill again.

You signed them, shouted the always ridiculous Chris Philp, sitting next to his leaders. One day, a therapist is going to have a field day with this first conservative bench. For now, self-awareness eludes them all. The Philpster acted as if he had sprung a trap. Pulling up his pants to reveal Union Jack socks in imagined triumph. It was almost pathetic.

Kemi rushed to run. Labor had abandoned the plan for Rwanda. Um, yes, because it was stupid. If Sunak had thought this was going to work, he would not have called an election in July.

Worse still, Keir had defended Shamima Begum. Here, KemiKaze might seem closer to home. Conservative Lord Verdirame, who is closely linked to the Badenoch operation, had served as UN special rapporteur on counter-terrorism and human rights in the Shamima Begum region. case. Pots and kettles. Monsignor is also a specialist in international arbitration. Something Kemi might need as she becomes embroiled in a dispute with the Nigerian government. Imagine if she did this as Prime Minister. You can't, can you? Just as good.

The session ended with Starmer asking Kemi to apologise. Both for the lies and for the failures of the Conservative Party. KemiKaze looked like he was about to implode. She never apologizes. Never explain. Just continues to exploit his fatal flaws. No weakness must be demonstrated. The irony is that it's in plain sight.

• Taking the Lead by John Crace is published by Little, Brown (18.99). To support the Guardian and waitObserver, order your copy at guardianbookshop.com. Delivery charges may apply.