College football End of 10 Week 8 – Texas Longhorns get messy

Inspiring thought of the week:

So put me in the ground

Put me six feet down

And let the stone say

“Here lies the girl whose only crutch loved one man a little too much”

If you go before me, I'll tell the gravedigger he better dig two

Count two

– “Better Dig Two”, The Band Perry

Here at Bottom 10 headquarters, located in the medical tent where the neck braces are kept to help Joey Galloway heal from whiplash, after spending entire Saturdays quickly turning his head to say, “WTH?” after every point Dan Mullen has made, we know that college football seasons turn the clubhouse into the back nine, and the room we live in can become a quickly emptying place.

At the start of every fall, coaches like to remind us that every team in the country starts the season with a zero in the loss column. But they never dare look through the bottom 10 mirror and let themselves be reminded that every team in the country also starts with a zero on the other side of that hyphen, or dash, or whatever it is, in the win column. .

So while those who claim to love the game continue to count and recount the dwindling number of FBS programs that remain undefeated, we here who truly adore this sport on a deeper level would like to remind everyone of the other record countdown . Those teams still looking for their first win of the fall.

The chamber of undefeated is still in double figures, a whopping 10. So what's the point of applauding that? Here in the Bottom 10 Cinematic Universe, we're down to two victoryless squads. The undefeated room is so busy that we're going to call the fire chief. Our room, the defeated room, college football's most exclusive club, only needs a fire extinguisher.

With apologies to Deuce McAllister, David “The Deuce” Palmer, Duce Staley, Rob Base and Steve Harvey, here are the Bottom 10 rankings after Week 8:

The Golden(plated) Flashes lost their 16th straight game, to Boiling Green with four losses after losing a pillow fight of the week against Baller State with four losses, and now they face Western Not Eastern or Central Michigan with three defeats, which are at the top. the #MACtion rankings. This is great if you've ever dreamed of seeing someone fall down a flight of stairs.

The New Owls on the Block (NOTB) ended their bye week and resumed their pursuit of Kent as the nation's only remaining oh-fer teams. Now Kennesaw Mountain will travel to Liberty Mountain on Wednesday night, where the undefeated Flames will open each game with a prayer before leaving opponents without a prayer.

The Eagles are making a big jump/fall in these rankings, thanks in part to being one of the first FBS programs to fire their head coach (heeeey, East Carolina…) and also because they found a potential Fun Belt dance partner for a possible season finale Pillow Fight of the Week of the Year of Century, or PFOWYOC, pronounced “puh-fow-yok,” which is also what Will Hall angrily called everyone in the front office as he was escorted out. And who is that PFOWYOC aimed at?

The East Coast Trojans, who have moved into the top four after three straight Fun Belt losses, now face the Fightin' Butches of Arkansaw State, the same team that just ended Will Hall's tenure in Hattiesburg.

A yellow flag was thrown on the field. Then Horns fans threw a bunch of stuff on the field. The flag was then removed from the field. The waste was then removed from the field. But…there was never another flag thrown because of the stuff thrown on the field?

The good news for the Blazers is that even if they keep losing, no one can see it because the entire state of Alabama is shrouded in thick white smoke from the dumpster fire on the Plains and the panic attacks in Tuscaloosa.

The Other Other Aggies continue their 2026 Pac-12 Admission celebration by playing as a 2022 Pac-12 team, falling to 1-6 after losing to the non-Aggies from New Mexico. While we obsess over current #MACtion PFOWYs and future Fun Belt PFOWYOCs, the state of Utah is heading out for a showdown that has snuck up on us, against…

The Chowboys knew the way to San Jose, but unfortunately, Spartan wideout Nick Nash knew the way to the end zone for the seventh straight game. If Wyoming wants to fulfill its dream of three-peating as Arizona Bowl champions, it can't lose again this season.

New Duke head coach Manny Diaz has now successfully defeated the coach who embarrassed him in Texas, Mack Brown of UNC, his alma mater FSU, and in two weeks has the opportunity to ruin the year for the school that gave him three fired years ago, Miami. The last time anyone passed through ACC country like this, he was carrying orders from Sherman.

The Buttermakers are 1-6 and 0-4 in conference play. After an open date they host Northworstrn, who are 3-4 and 1-3 in the conference. With all the changes in college football, especially in the Big Ten, this game is like being wrapped in an old blanket from your grandma's house. Sure, it needs to be washed and it smells like a gym sock dipped in kitty litter and VapoRub, but at least it's known.

Waiting list: UMess, FI(notA)U, UTEPid (aka the team that just beat FIU), Temple of Doom, Living on Tulsa Time (aka the team that just lost to Temple of Doom), Whew Mexico State, Me-dle Tennessee, Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-Tech, Baller State, Miss Sus Hippie State, Snore Eagle, Akronmonious, flopping.