Andrew Garfield bares his soul

Andrew Garfield has been remarkably candid about his experience grieving the loss of his mother, who died in 2019 from pancreatic cancer. So when he first read Nick Payne's script We live in timethe British star felt an immediate connection with his exploration of love and loss. Directed by John Crowley, the film follows Garfield's Tobias and Florence Pugh's Almut as they fall in love, build a life together and face the heartbreak of an untimely death. While it may seem obvious to avoid a project so entwined with personal grief, Garfield, now 41, saw it as an opportunity to delve deeper into his emotions.

We live in time is about profound loss but also about great joy. Your mother passed away not too long ago and it's interesting that you were drawn to a project that was so emotional.

I was in the middle of a period of reflection and harvesting the things in my life. Looking back, looking forward as a 40 year old who knows loss in a very intimate way. It was like, what now? I didn't really have a good answer. I just wanted to sing into the abyss until an answer came. And a melody came, in the form of We live in time. The script spoke to me about the brevity and sanctity of life, and about living with courage, boldness and vulnerability in the face of the inevitable greater adversary. Everything dies, everything is lost, and we must take that simple fact into account.

I thought it would add to your sadness.

No. As artists we work with the raw materials of our own lives, of our own heartache. I get to alchemize, transmute, sublimate whatever my soul is going through. And hopefully the film can be a generous act for an audience. The best art is the stuff where the artist's hands reach through the screen or the book or whatever and say, “You're not alone.”

You previously worked with director John Crowley Boy A. What was it like being together again?

For the past 16 years we have been looking for something to make together. John would email me every two years and say, This could be it, but it never quite was. Then he sent this one and said, This could be the one where we meet again. I read it and immediately thought: yes, this is for me.

You play opposite Florence Pugh. Was she the first choice for the role of Almut?

Yes, Florence was at the top of our list. She is someone I have admired ever since Lady Macbeth. Everything she does is magic.

You are both powers, but different kinds of powers.

Yes, [Tobias] is softer and calmer. He's not Eduardo Saverin [the cofounder of Facebook, whom Garfield portrayed in The Social Network]blowing the doors off and destroying the laptop. I had to use a different kind of strength and solidity. There is a calmer, inner knowing of my own worth and worth, rather than having to shout at people. Florence's character, Almut, is more of a typhoon of a person, a dynamic, ambitious mover and shaker. It always felt equal. There was a reciprocated generosity that I felt from Florence in this film. I felt very supported in my work, as I hope she did in hers.

What is your secret skill? I know you surf.

I'm not a very good surfer. I like surfing. It's one of my favorite things to do, but the reason is because I don't have to be good at it. I can just enjoy it. It's one of the few things in my life that's just for me. So I'm very passionate about that sport. I'm pretty good at ping pong. I'm quite arrogant about it too! I have my own paddle, a Timo Boll butterfly paddle.

Did you watch the table tennis match at the Olympic Games last summer?

Yes of course. I've looked at everything. BMX, skateboarding, kayaking. Who knew kayaking could be so damn exciting? I didn't see any break dancing, except Raygun. That was a surreal moment. I saw her live and thought: is this someone trying for the first time? And she has now become a global icon, which is amazing.

Are you more of a cat or a dog?

Dog of course. I have no aloofness. I love affection all the time. I am a pack animal. I love being with the gang. I am always looking for treats, warmth, coziness, comfort and play. I'm a dog, but I'm a very vanilla dog, like a Golden Retriever or Lab. Very boisterous.

And dogs can surf.

Yes, it is a goal of mine to have a dog that can surf. And a child. If I ever have a child and they are ready, I want a large, soft-topped board to hold my child. However, I need to get better at surfing before I can take on the responsibility of another life on a surfboard.

What is your favorite reality show?

At this moment, The traitors. The British version. I like the American version, but the British version, with Claudia Winkleman, is the best. I don't know if a better television show has ever been made. My guilty pleasure is Too hot to handle on Netflix. Fuck, it's really good. A bunch of handsome men and women think they're going out Love Islandkind of tones. They're all horny and hot, and then they discover that the only way to win the prize money is if they don't fuck each other. The competition is hosted by some kind of Alexa robot, and she tells them, “You were all selected because you are terrified of intimacy. You stay here for a week, and if you do anything physically that doesn't come from a real emotional connection, you will be fined. And something amazing happens: these people begin to reveal their traumas, and suddenly they become softer and vulnerable. It's a very beautiful thing.

What is your pet peeve?

Arriving late. Especially for specific things like theater. I'll kill a bitch. I'll cut someone. You don't do that unless there is an emergency. I struggle with disrespect for other people's time.

Do you ever try to manifest things?

No, not really. I wouldn't deign to think that I knew better than the universe. I'm open, I'm here. I have a lot of desire in my body and my heart, but there is a difference between willfulness and, for lack of a better word, God's.

Will you get star status?

I'm uncomfortably star struck. I wish I didn't do that because sometimes I literally feel like I'm having a freeze reaction. Even if it's a person I know I could get along with, I just get overwhelmed. When I met Tom Hanks, I thought, I can't look at you. But I'm getting better at it. The Governors Awards were a wonderful evening, but there were a few people I had trouble making eye contact with. I just try to remember that everyone is a person, and I am a person. Because when people are affected by me, I think: what's wrong with you? It's such a surreal experience because I know my weaknesses so deeply. I know my humanity. I am constantly humiliated by myself and my own choices.

Style director: Allia Alliata di Montereale. Hair for portfolio by Paul Hanlon at Dawes & Co.; make-up for portfolio by Sam Visser at Art Partner; manicures for portfolio by michelle saunders james. Set design by Gerard Santos at Lalaland.

Creative producer of Mert Alas & Marcus Piggott: Leonard Cuinet-Petit at January Productions; producer of Mert Alas & Marcus Piggott: Kevin Isabelle; produced by AP Studio, Inc.; executive producer: Alexis Piqueras; producer: Anneliese Kristedja; associate producer: Kimmy DAncona; production manager: Hayley Stephon; production coordinators: Miranda Dos Santos, Susan Lucas; photography assistants: John Neate, Jed Barnes, Chris Whitaker, Kendall Peck; digital technician: Niccolo Pacilli; digital assistant: Cassian Gray; post-production by Dreamer Post Production; fashion assistants: Tyler VanVranken, Molly Cody, Celeste Roh, Raea Palmieri, Tatiana Isshac, Haleigh Nickerson, Lauren Marron, Savannah Steilner, Sage McKee, Frankie Benkovic, Kaley Azambuja, Tatum Sanchez; production assistants: Gigi Rosenfield, Lily Cordingley, Eli Cash, Lex Vaughn, Anderson Renno, Kat Saravia, Kyle Dekker, Wyatt Noble, Brandon Martin, Moose Krupski, Josh Muwwakkil, Bradley Gonsalves, Drew Carter, Thomas Lynch, Alex Kofman, Jackson Schrader, Anatalia Zavaleta, Joseph Wride, Matt Flynn; first AD: Steve Kemp; location manager: Kyle Hollinger; hair assistants: Kim Garduno, Ben Gregory, Marco Iafrate, Hyacinthia Faustino, Chris Foster; makeup assistants: Shimu Takanori, Laura Dudley, Brian Dean, Beatrice Sandoval; manicure assistant: Cheyenne Vander Schuur; set design assistants: Seth Powsner, Denver Stoddard, Ryan Johnson; Tailors: Irina Tshartaryan, Ripsime Vartanyan, Jackie Martirosyan at Susies Custom Designs, Inc.