Lockdown Musts: 1970s Disaster Debacles

However, the airport is a recent movie enough to portray airports as crowded and crowded hellfires, but old enough to run a fake pilot (of course!) Directed by Dean Martin. At one point, Martin is trying to compel a flight attendant to engage in sexual activity by saying: “If you throw me the most pressure and then throw me in the opposite direction, it could damage my engine.”

Sorry. Can you hang a moment?

* Puts a fist through the wall *

This is better.

This movie is also old enough to provide time before airport security. There are conspiracies about passengers not being stopped on flights; men carrying accidental bombs on planes inside their bags; airport staff are suspicious of passengers ’bags, but they are told:“ There is nothing we can do about this. ” (If we are allowed at the airports again, the next time the TSA agent asks me to take off my shoes, maybe I will accept them.)

In the end, the airport is basically a two and a half hour time capsule a) how stupid we were, and; b) how tolerant audiences were of unnecessary long films featuring long scenes of the snow shovel.

Speaking of that, almost nothing happens in the first fifty minutes of the 1974. Earthquake does not really mind that, because instead of snowy things, you get a variety of fun dispersal factors like Geneviève Bujold wardrobe in pink over pink over pink on pink and veil Walter Matthau as a drunk lamb. (Nevertheless, for some reason, in the credits he included as “Walter Matuschanskayasky.” Obviously there is a joke here, but I can’t find the punch).

Best of all, there is the funny Charlton Heston car, which looks like this:

What is that? Where is the ceiling? Was it designed by a 6-year-old boy? Does the orange tape make it faster? Regardless of the answers, it tells you everything you need to know about Heston’s character. By the way his name is Graf. (Graph.)

Earthquake is a movie in which skyscrapers come with windows that can be broken by neatly pushing office chairs against them, and homes spontaneously explode for no reason. It’s a movie, upon a very bad earthquake experience, Charlton Heston still does not put the roof on his car, civilian herdmen leave to the lower floors, and high-rise office workers – this is my favorite – accumulate in the closest lift.

So, yes. These people are stupid even from the land staff at the airport.

All this will make you happy on the ground, over the water and not hindered by the fall of concrete slabs.

Until next week, stay safe and keep on protecting.

For other Lockdown essentials, click here.

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