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It Just Spiraled: Meg Lanning Opens Up About Struggle That Led To Retirement From Cricket | Cricket
Former Australian cricket captain Meg Lanning struggled with an unhealthy relationship with exercise and food ahead of her shock retirement. Lanning, who describes herself as a private person, has finally decided to open up about why she ended her international career last November at the age of 31.
The Victorian took an extended break from cricket in 2022, returning to lead Australia to a Twenty20 World Cup title in February 2023, but suddenly withdrew from last year's Ashes for undisclosed medical reasons.
Lanning has revealed that outside of cricket, she struggled with an identity crisis that even her teammates and closest friends knew nothing about. She often ate only two insignificant meals a day, despite running up to 55 miles a week.
Lanning did not label her relatively insignificant food intake as an eating disorder, but admitted that she denied needing help.
It really just spiraled, Lanning told The Howie Games podcast. I wasn't in a place where I could go on tour and play cricket and give the dedication that was required for that Ashes series, both mentally and physically.
I went from 64kg to about 57kg. Relations had gotten quite out of hand. It was just all out of control and I kept sliding. At some point it has to stop. I felt very out of control when it came to what my future looked like: if it's not cricket, what is life like if I don't play?
At her lowest, Lanning slept only a few hours a night.
I dreaded the night because I knew I would go to bed and not be able to sleep, she said. That would make me so angry. I would just get angrier at myself. If you can't sleep, you can't do anything.'
Dealing with health challenges privately, Lanning was still able to perform on the field, but he could no longer commit to captaining Australia and touring regularly.
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No matter what happened, I could always perform, she said. [But] it had become a bit of an autopilot.
The star batsman has continued to play in the Women's Big Bash League, the National Cricket League and the lucrative Women's Premier League in India, but has decided not to represent Australia anymore.
She led the country to a record five T20 World Cup crowns after becoming Australia's youngest skipper in 2014, at the age of 21. A three-time Belinda Clark Medal winner, Lanning scored 8,352 runs from 241 international matches after making her debut in the T20s in 2010. .
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