“I didn’t even know that men got breast cancer.”

2017 Richard and Lorraine one year before the diagnosis

For 30 years, doctors dismissed Richard Mead’s concerns About the chest lump – and finally he Taken seriously, it was too late. He is in Annamua A catastrophic diagnosis was avoided

When Richard Mead was 11 years old, he noticed a lump under his right nipple. “It felt like a hard bean and it looked like it came from everywhere,” he says. “My dad took me to the doctor’s office and examined me and said it was a hormone. I was told it might disappear after adolescence.”

But it never “disappears,” and the lumps plagued him for years. The boys made fun of him when he turned into PE at school. “I’m thin-I’ve always had low body fat-a lump was protruding sideways,” said Richard, now 41, a marine engineer. He consulted several doctors in their 20s and 30s. “I always used the opportunity to ask about it, whether it was because of an unrelated promise or embarrassing to bring it up. Their attitude was,” It was always there. Is it a problem? “Since NHS was just a” cosmetic “and could not be deleted, I resigned from living with NHS. The last GP who confirmed it in his mid thirties was, “I can affirm that I will not have cancer!”

Tragically, that GP and everything else before him were wrong. In October 2018, shortly after Richard’s 40th birthday, the lump became painful and the pain spread to his armpits, causing swelling. He named his partner Lorraine Milligan, who claimed to see his GP soon. “Richard was worried that he might get away, so I went with him,” says make-up artist and photographer Lorraine. “I needed some answers.”

This time, Richard’s GP didn’t say he wouldn’t get cancer, but at first glance he introduced him as an emergency appointment to a breast care unit. After a whirlwind of testing, Richard was diagnosed with metastatic (secondary) breast cancer. It had already spread to his lymph nodes, lungs and liver. What might have begun as benign growth became malignant at some point.

“I was totally shocked, embarrassed and resentful,” he says. “I had been laid off that year for my doctor’s surgery. Breast cancer was never mentioned as a risk, and it’s unforgivable. I didn’t even know that men could get it.”

It is possible that his doctor did not even know. Breast cancer awareness and support is one of the greatest successes in treating cancer. All women understand the importance of checking their breasts and know the symbol of the “pink ribbon”. Breast cancer research is funded more than any other form of cancer. Still, breast cancer in men is overlooked, poorly studied, and poorly recognized.

Last fall, Beyoncé’s father Matthew Knowles, 68, Good morning America About his own diagnosis and treatment of breast cancer. (“Talk about it,” he urged the viewer. “Speak up.

Faster, faster, faster … ‘) This is because the current silence kills us. Breast cancer in men can be rare-about 370 cases a year in the UK-but it is usually diagnosed much later than in women.

Lorraine took a picture of this Richard as part of the #bluegetittoo campaign

Professor Valerie Speirs is a cancer biologist who specializes in male breast cancer at the University of Aberdeen. “There is a lack of awareness not only among the general public, but also by health care professionals,” she says. “General practitioners tend to deny symptomatic men a bit, which can delay diagnosis.”

For Lorraine and Richard, this meant letting go of the life they planned together. The couple met just two years before his diagnosis. Lorraine was at the Wargrave Marina in Berkshire when he first saw Richard fixing a hole in the ship’s hull. (“He was tall, dark, handsome, and mysterious. My testimony reminds me,” It’s a big hull! “) Their relationship blossomed. They shared the dream of living on a boat, and a year later, they offered for a beautiful barge in Amsterdam and set sail for England in October 2017. Both have children in a former relationship – Richard has three and Lorraine has one son. They imagined a mixed family living on water.

“It was a combination of home and holiday. The following year we were blessed with the hot summer we spent exploring the local waterways,” Lorraine says. “I knew a little bit that Richard was more likely to have secondary breast cancer,” the diagnosis was made in November.

The lump-5.5 cm in diameter-was not removed. “The doctor decided it was pointless because the secondary tumor was so advanced,” Lorraine says. “Now I have to live with a reminder.” For the next eight months, Richard had seven rounds of chemotherapy. He was long-term approved by his beloved career because stagnant water, rust and dirt are too likely to expose him to infections. He is currently taking the estrogen suppressor tamoxifen and receiving antibody therapy every 3 weeks. He is also waiting for new targeting antibody / chemotherapy combinations to extend his lifespan – it is not safe to incorporate the current COVID-19 pandemic as it reduces immunity. Now he is isolated on their boat, where he suffered depression, anxiety and panic attacks. He finds it difficult to talk about his cancer. The last scan showed the progression of some tumors.

“After the diagnosis, we sorted out all his medical care and consultation,” says Lorraine.

“I decided to get everything working. Keeping my work promises, being a good mother of my 9-year-old son, and being mindful of Richard. It’s scary to see suffering. “

Blue also gets it. View Campaign here

In the midst of all, Lorraine can’t shake the feeling that if Richard were a woman, she would have a huge support network and have multiple ways to connect with people in similar situations. was. Early his cancer.

“The danger of working on a pink sea breast cancer campaign is that the morning image of pink ribbons, bras and woman-led coffee makes breast cancer look like a women-only luxury club,” she says. I will.

(In fact, in the eye-catching pink fundraiser, Race for Life, men could only participate for the first time in the last 25 years.) As a result, breast cancer affects only women. I think I’m sick. ”

On October 1, 2019, Lorraine launched her own #bluegetittoo awareness campaign on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter to celebrate Breast Cancer Awareness Month. She created a short film for people to see and share, and created a photo campaign of all realistic live portraits, including scars on breast cancer patients (female and Richard).

Richard 11 years – the year when the lump first appeared

The reaction from men is amazing. “I was contacted by a man who asked me to leave the waiting room of the breast unit because the other patient thought it was a female-only space,” she says. “We know that men who have gone away from the Breast Cancer Forum are to prevent women from feeling unable to speak freely. Men tell us that they feel lonely in the world of pink women And when they told a friend about the diagnosis, the response was always “Did men also have breast cancer?” Matthew Knowles explained a similar experience in the United States, to have a breast test. You need to step into a building that says “Women’s Breast Clinic” and answer questions including “When was the last time you did a cycle?” Have you been pregnant? “

Jane Murphy, a clinical nurse specialist at Brest Cancer Now, says men with breast cancer often talk about embarrassment and isolation. “The first and most common reaction is shock,” she says. “And then there’s the stigma of having something that’s very relevant to women. It’s harder to get support, connect with other men, and especially feel that many people have trouble speaking. For breast cancer, welcome lines for men and online forums, as well as telephone and email services-someone like me-get them in contact with each other.

As for research, Professor Speyers believes things are slowly improving. “10 years ago, the study arose from a small number of cases in a single hospital setting,” she says. “People are now awakening to the fact that male breast cancer exists.” Professor Speirs helped establish a male breast cancer consortium. It worked with a pathologist to collect samples from hundreds of men with breast cancer. Breast cancer in men is likely to be estrogen receptor-positive (ER +) and is believed to account for 92% of breast cancer in men, rather than 70% in women. There is some evidence that estrogen levels in men at highest risk are higher than normal because of certain genetic conditions, obesity, or long-term liver damage.

“Treatment is similar to what we give women, and ER + is a cancer with better outcomes-the more likely it is to respond to tamoxifen if diagnosed in a timely manner,” said Professor Speirs. I will. However, tamoxifen has various side effects in male patients, including impotence, which causes men to stop taking it.

Studies show that male breast cancer is more common in men over the age of 60 and in men who have a strong history of female breast cancer in their families. About 10% of all breast cancer cases contain mutations in the BRCA2 gene. Mathew Knowles, whose aunt and cousin died of breast cancer, were found to be carriers of BRCA2, and his diagnosis also tested Beyoncé and her sister Solange Knowles for the gene.

The expansion of knowledge may be too late for Richard, but he and Lorraine are both confident that #bluegetittoo will help make a lasting change. “Without Lorraine and her care, I wouldn’t be by my side,” Richard says. “And if the campaign she created helps others, it brings me some comfort.”

Meanwhile, the couple remain isolated on the boat, counting down the number of days until COVID-19 passes and Richard can begin a new treatment.

“When men find themselves at risk, they talk about it, share facts, and look for symptoms,” Lorraine says. “The message needs to be about unity. I don’t want others to experience this.”

Breast cancer symptoms in men

For more information on the Breast Cancer Now campaign, Or call the Breast Cancer Now nurse at 0808 800 6000

• For more information on the Breast Cancer Now campaign, Or call the Breast Cancer Now nurse at 0808 800 6000.