Rap career and hockey reboot

Josh Ho-Sang had to think about whether he had more nerves when he made his NHL debut with the Islanders or last week when he released his first rap album, SAME.

He chuckled and then responded.

To be honest, probably the album because it had such a new feeling. Hockey I know I understand that, Ho-Sang told The Post by phone. My music was literally like minor hockey. I felt like I was learning to skate, like I was being exposed.

Considering the meaning behind his music and the app Pick-Up Pro Sports or PUP intended to allow users to find pick-up games, events and practices and reward them for being active, it's understandable the nerves Ho-Sang had when the two passion projects were released days apart.

The app, in Ho-Sang's words, allows people to “connect on an even higher level” while creating a space “where people can be active, learn and be rewarded.”

At 28 years old and several years removed from his time with the Islanders, who selected 28th overall in the 2014 NHL Draft, Ho-Sang is in a much different place than during his sometimes chaotic experience on Long Island.

In a nearly 45-minute candid conversation with The Post, Ho-Sang, who is also restarting his hockey career with the ECHL's Florida Everblades, explained how music played a role in his mental healing after hearing the constant criticism and clouding by noise. , which led to some of the mistakes he's made over the years.

It's strange to be told what you are during your developmental stages from 18 to 22. People say, 'You're lazy, you don't do this, you don't do that.' And at that age, you're still trying to figure out your identity, Ho-Sang said. I think with the music I really wanted to express some of the depth that all athletes have, not just me. Being able to provide perspective on some of the things I've been through and being able to share that some of the things I've been through have hurt but not defeated me.

Ho-Sang's tenure with the Islanders is still seen as a “what if” period by fans, who were quick to embrace him when he was drafted a decade ago.

His attacking prowess was undoubted, but questions about character issues arose.

He also didn't help his cause at times, which Ho-Sang acknowledges.

All you can do is take responsibility for what you did and if I could tell you right now that I was perfect in New York, I would. I wasn't, but that's the reality. “I made a few mistakes here and there,” Ho-Sang said.

Ho-Sang said he remembers the highs more than the lows during his time with the Islanders, pointing to being able to play with Brock Nelson and Josh Bailey and witnessing Mat Barzal have a standout rookie campaign.

Nevertheless, it became clear what impact his public dressing up in 2015 had during the first day of training.

Ho-Sang showed up late and was made to climb the stairs of the Nassau Coliseum for more than three hours by then-general manager Garth Snow, and was subsequently sent back to junior hockey as news of the incident became fodder in the media.

So imagine you're 19, right? he said. Having those eight hours of hell. For me, that kind of confused me. I was fortunate enough to be sent to a great organization in the Niagara IceDogs and they helped me find a bit of a foundation and from there I was able to have some success.

The winger said he somewhat understood why the Islanders chose to make the details so public, but said it made him feel very naked.

Ho-Sang would play 53 NHL games for the Islanders, including a 21-game stint in 2016-17 when he scored four goals and had 10 points, but the stigma always seemed to follow and the outside noise stayed with him.

I think some of the things that might not have been clear to people were that I was a 19 year old who had articles in the New York Times, the New York Post and the Toronto Star about how I was late and how I actually got the The biggest uh-oh from a draft pick in the last five years, Ho-Sang said. And then I don't play the most linear game, so when your game is questioned, everything is questioned.

Music had always been a part of Ho-Sang's life from childhood and would watch his father Wayne Ho-Sang, a member of the reggae band Fujahtive, perform or hear him play the piano in the house and became an outlet for music. him later in life at the suggestion of his therapist, which Ho-Sang said started seeing him outside the organizational structure.

My therapist encouraged me to use my music to see how I feel, he said. Just write, write songs and if you see something popping up repeatedly, that's a good sign that this is on your mind and you need to do something about it. So I started using music that way. Throughout my struggle, I think from age 22 to now, music has saved me in so many ways. There are songs that literally saved my life.

Fast forward to this month and Ho-Sang hoped that the songs on SAME can help people going through a difficult time and that his journey can be a source of inspiration.

Ho-Sang said he has heard from a number of people in the hockey world who have listened to his music and reached out expressing a greater understanding of what he went through, including some former general managers, although he would not specify which ones.

The forward did express fear that his message would be lost in some of the more explicit lyrics in the songs, but the positive messages he received have reaffirmed what I thought: that's not a bad thing for anyone in hockey. Sometimes people don't know.

On the ice of Long Island

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Ho-Sang scored his first ECHL goal and finished with two points in his second game with the Everblades on Saturday.

Is the NHL still the goal?

For me, I just want to play hockey. If those guys like me and want to put me in the NHL then that's cool, but for me I just want to win, Ho-Sang said.

And most importantly, he finds peace.

“I am so incredibly proud of where I am today,” he said. Because there were times where I didn't think I would be, and I think being able to overcome that doubt I felt in the past gives me so much strength for the future. I feel like I'm in a mental state where I feel like I can do anything.

I put out a rap album that people didn't hate. I dropped an app that will move society and get people moving, having fun and allowing me to offer these gifts to the world. And then to be able to come back and play hockey, which is the gift to myself. Yes, the happiest man in the world.